The Power of Forgiveness and Love

Posted on October 21, 2014 by new desert

The Power of Forgiveness and Love
Cleansing the Past to Flood the Future
October 16

Today, Thursday, October 16, was a beautiful day. I would like to consecrate the beauty of each and every day with one of the prayers we recited, as a group, over the course of the past few days.

May I see this day through Buddha eyes
May I hear this day through Buddha ears
May I love this day with a Buddha heart
May all I come in contact be awakened to their True Nature

For the past five days and nights, I have been attending a retreat in the high mountains of Colorado. This opportunity to cleanse and refresh ourselves in such a beautiful environment was offered to us by the Vajra Flame Foundation (http://vajraflame.org/). Gratitude flows to those who made it happen.

We are a group of forty-two souls united in purpose and commitment to make this world a more equal and loving place. This is not an easy task and it requires us to open up and expand our hearts—not to mention our energy bodies—to the most we can. The title of the retreat is “Sacred Geometry and the Energy Body.”

The theme of Sacred Geometry has been tickling me deeply since I acquired a Metatron’s Cube in June (http://iconnect2all.com/landing/dk/). I am at a point where I enjoy my meditation upon the Cube, yet do not really know how to use it and am unsure about its potentiality. I brought these doubts and questions into the retreat, intrigued that I am by the geometric figure sitting in the center of the Cube: two opposing pyramids (or tetrahedrons) which form an octahedron (an eight-face shape).

On Sunday evening, I felt something popping up into my awareness. It was more than a thought—possibly a sign, or a guidepost, on my path—and it grabbed my attention as if it carried a special message. In April of this year, I watched a video by Gregg Braden where he addressed the 7 Essene Mirrors – (https://nurturingthegiftofseeking.org/2014/04/05/the-seven-essene-mirros-a-workshop-by-gregg-braden/). The 5th Essene Mirror relates to our perception of our Divine Mother and Divine Father. Gregg asserts that our belief and attitude toward our parents influence the perception we have of the Divine Mother and Divine Father. On Sunday evening, the message was specifically about my father and the opinion I had of him. The light was blinking, so to speak, and this area lit as “unresolved.” As gentle and loving as my father was, he was emotionally withdrawn to the point that neither my brother nor I thought we had a father—to the extent that a human being cannot be whole without expressing a gradation of emotions. The door to my father‘s emotions had apparently been shut tight long ago, most likely because of what he experienced as a young child first, and as a teenager growing up during the tumultuous years leading to WWII. The little I know about my father’s childhood and apparent suffering, I learned it from my mother.

The other facet of my impression about my father relates to the imbalance of power between my parents. My father was what one would describe as ‘henpecked;’ my mother would make most of the decisions, ruling our family coop with an iron fist—and much more.

I was conscious of my impressions of my father but didn’t realize how influential they were in the background of my life. My father passed away in June of 2005, our last encounter wasn’t the most beautiful as he further revealed his weakness to us; and the past is past, isn’t it? It cannot be changed, or so I thought.

The sudden eruption of Gregg Braden’s Fifth Essene Mirror nudged me to pray in order to forgive my father—and myself; and I did, in French.

Over the next few days, a potent image came to me as I kept meditating. I envisioned a high-altitude dam filled by cooling water, with glowing mountains in the background. I was praying for the power of the accumulated water to create a breach in the dam, so that it would eventually collapse. The water was clearly a symbol of Love, and I asked Master Jesus for assistance. I knew this water-Love would eventually flood the valley down the dam, and flow way beyond it, into humanity’s pores.

I did not get a clear picture of the success of this meditation but I knew the alchemical process had been activated within. Working with, and meditating upon, the various Sacred Geometry forms that guest speaker Gregory Hoag (http://iconnect2all.com/) had brought to the retreat instilled a fresh realization in me. The brochure that passed before my eyes one morning during a group exercise described Metatron’s Cube as “a strong grounding tool for sleep, relaxation, [providing] deep release of blocks for forgiveness and gratefulness.”

As I read the last eight words, it dawned on me that ‘practicing the Cube’ over the past few months had allowed me to mystically bring this “Father-block” into awareness. My questions were answered and my doubts vanished.

As I returned from a downtown escapade on Wednesday evening, I faced the majestic snow-capped mountains and shouted my gratitude into the vastness of the environment; not knowing that it was a beginning of a huge energetic release.

‘Someone’ woke me up early this morning—Thursday. I tried to stay in bed a little but the temptation was too strong. Instead of first jumping into the shower—which I did the other days—I pulled my meditation chair and turned on the spinning base below my Cube.

Here are the sentences that came out of my being and that I chanted over the course of the next forty minutes.

• “Je te pardonne, Papa, avec Amour.” [I forgive you, Papa, with Love]

• “Je te pardonne, Gilles-soul, with Love.”

I forgive you, Gilles, for the opinions you formed about your father, and for the expectations you nurtured of him.

• “I forgive you, Gilles-soul, for any forms of aggravation.”

Strangely enough, a person in my hometown neighborhood came to mind as I was chanting the previous sentence. Although my family had a somewhat cordial relationship with him, there were reasons to be aggravated by his behavior.

• “Je t’aime, Papa-soul, et je te soutiens.” [I love you, Papa-soul, and I support you]

This support—that I wish I could have offered to my father ‘back then’—relates to numerous family dinner occurrences where my mother would verbally abuse us all, and humiliate my father; for instance because he wasn’t able to properly write a check. The memory of my being a young teenager has somewhat faded, due to the effect of time and a desire to repress these awkward occurrences, but I clearly remember a strong sense of guilt for not being able to support my father during these grueling times. I was young, immature, and my reaction facing those motherly storms was to shrink, wait for cooler times, or simply laugh. I do not know where this poisonous feeling of guilt went afterwards, but it was obviously locked at some semi-conscious level, till I unearthed and cleansed it this morning.

• “You are free to fly, Gilles”

• “You are free to love, Gilles”

As I was about to complete my meditation, I felt an urge to ask for proof of my healing and hoped my father would communicate with me. He did in a subtle way. A few minutes later, I found myself in the hallway using the lodge’s computer to check my messages. Nothing of importance. As I was about to close my account, I received a note from a friend. As it turned out, this person popped out of my consciousness one morning the year prior, and I could see her in a “Cocoon of Love.” (https://nurturingthegiftofseeking.org/2013/07/22/in-a-cocoon-of-love/) Mystically, I was then in the same state as I am now—Colorado, surrounded by precious mountains.

All in all, it feels like an inner tectonic plate has shifted, although I do not have a clear picture, at this early hour, why it did and how it did. Purpose often reveals itself in retrospect. However, as I kept meditating in the wee hours of Friday morning, right after writing this note, the image of a dagger came to mind. It is a dagger that had been planted in my heart long, long ago, and that I was able to finally remove with the assistance of so many benevolent souls and deities. Interestingly, I had a similar ‘entrance’ into an awakening coaching session earlier this year when I recollected an image of my mother stabbing me in the heart with her harsh criticism. Little did I know that both wounds had a similar quality.

Making peace with the past

I would like to end this account by sharing a beautiful prayer that fell on my lap a few days ago. It is entitled, “Go Deeper than Love.”

Go Deeper than Love

Go deeper than love, for the soul has greater depths,
love is like the grass, but the heart is deep wild rock
molten, yet dense and permanent.

Go down to your deep old heart, and lose sight of yourself.
And lose sight of me, the me whom you turbulently loved.

Let us lose sight of ourselves, and break the mirrors.
For the fierce curve of our lives is moving again to the depths
out of sight, in the deep living heart.

D.H. Lawrence

(excerpt from Know Thyself, Know Thyself More Deeply)

absence of judgment

Footnote: Please do not think that this adventure was all glory and liberation. All week long, I was chased by two inner demons. The first one was a strong sense of guilt–yes, guilt!–for leaving my family behind for a full week. The second was an obsession with missing my return flight. My scheduled was tight and I kept thinking of what might happen if… At some point during the week, I got calmer, and then one participant asked me for a ride to the airport (I had rented a car), which rekindled the gnawing feeling. Did someone ever say, “No pain, no gain”?

Posted in My Personal Path | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

Go Deeper than Love

Posted on October 4, 2014 by new desert

Go Deeper than Love

Go deeper than love, for the soul has greater depths,
love is like the grass, but the heart is deep wild rock
molten, yet dense and permanent.

Go down to your deep old heart, and lose sight of yourself.
And lose sight of me, the me whom you turbulently loved.

Let us lose sight of ourselves, and break the mirrors.
For the fierce curve of our lives is moving again to the depths
out of sight, in the deep living heart.

D.H. Lawrence

(excerpt from Know Thyself, Know Thyself More Deeply)

Posted in Authors, Quotes on consciousness | Tagged , | Leave a comment

A voyage across Consciousnesses, Languages and Worldviews

Posted on September 29, 2014 by new desert

September 28

As a family, we recently returned from a vacation to France, the land of my origin and a mystical place in many ways. Within that three-week vacation, we took a trip to the region of Auvergne to get reacquainted with the roots of my mother’s family, for nine days. We were a family of five, including my brother and mother who live in France. They do not speak English when the remainder of my family here in the US speaks little French.

It was a most challenging trip at times and yet a beautiful one which has etched in our minds and hearts beautiful memories of meeting new people (i.e., our young cousins) and discovering new lands. We stayed in a locale at the border –so to speak—between the départements (~counties) of Haute-Loire (where my maternal grandparents were born) and Ardèche.

It was most challenging because of the consciousnesses involved—that how I saw it this time, with a burgeoning one (our son, who is 4-years old) and a wilting one, my mother’s, at the grand age of almost 87. Challenging because my mother is slowly but surely en train de perdre la téte (losing her mind) and because what we experienced in our childhood, my brother and I, is catching up with us whenever we travel as a family. Interestingly, despite losing her short-term memory, my mother has preserved the traits that would constrain us most while growing up, and which are now directed at our son, for whatever reason. These traits and fears have to do with authoritarianism and its corollary, the need to control; fear of the dark when night comes; and time pressure—traits which appear to be impeccably intact despite the years. They do not manifest as strongly as they did forty years ago, but when they do, they rub all of us the wrong way.

I only lost my cool once when, positioned behind our son and I, my mother ordered me to stop serving him pasta. I pushed her aside, so that she wouldn’t have sight of the pasta bar, and our son noticed it. He asked right away why I pushed her aside; I explained to him later on. Even though he may not have a strong command of the French language, he understands some of what goes on.

The rest of the time, my brother and I ignored my mother’s remarks and her words or facial expressions fell on deaf ears and blind eyes. Given the high level of assistance she requires from us (she has diabetes and frail legs, meaning she can hardly walk more than fifty meters), it is a delicate balance to find between caring for an individual at the twilight of her life and asserting oneself whenever necessary.

This is the second time in sixteen months that I find myself in a similar situation, being at the intersection of various consciousnesses, languages and worldviews. This time around, I felt more confident and almost enjoyed the challenge, torn that I was at times between conflicting directions and sometimes criticisms. One thing that rang true, deep down within, is that I need to follow my own voice, my own intuition. When I think or feel that something is right, I need to follow through and ignore the contradictory remarks of those surrounding me.

There was a peculiar moment when this became crystal clear to me. On Friday afternoon, after a delicious lunch in a local auberge, we went to visit an attraction called “Miniature Haute-Loire” which offered various buildings and sites of the département recomposed in an open area. There was a steep road above the parking lot and a sign forbidding any cars to go any further. I knew my mother wouldn’t be able to climb that hill and I drove off the parking lot to explore the area. My brother asked me to continue further ahead, and another member of the family suggested we go elsewhere. Instead I looped around, came back to the parking lot, parked the car and walked up the hill to inquire about the possibility of driving up the road with a low-mobility person. The attendant was very understanding and we ended up parking further up, next to the entrance of the site.

It’s noteworthy that I mentioned a steep road that I needed to walk on my own because, metaphorically, this is how I feel about the first eight months of 2014. I had to climb up a hill, my pace was extremely sluggish, I had little visibility and it felt like I didn’t accomplish much. Now that we have returned from France, I feel that I am “over the hump” and that the remainder of the journey will be more enjoyable.

It also felt like a clot in a vein; it bothered me for a while, impeded my progress, and now, under the effect of “burning up some additional family karma,” for the benefit of my entire family, both here in the US and France, I feel somehow liberated. This feeling is hard to put into words, but a burden of some sort has been lifted off my shoulders; or so it seems.

Since we came back, I’ve had periods of bliss which, interestingly, occurred in the evening. One of these periods occurred two days in a row and made me wonder. The feeling is still artificial (i.e., ego-driven) but it noticeable enough that I want to question and honor it at the same time.

One intriguing thing also happened five days ago. I received a LinkedIn message from a person working at VoiceAmerica, a radio network which produces and broadcasts live and on demand talk radio programming. This person offered me the possibility of becoming a host. This is just a possibility at this point, and we need to talk some more, but the synchronicity of this call following our trip to France is simply amazing. I have had the same profile on LinkedIn for about two years now—that of a spiritual companion—and it hasn’t produced any significant interest.

Have the times really changed, and is it time to merge into a different being?

merging

One more beautiful synchronicity occurred last night. Right after finishing the writing of this post, I came across, via a post on Facebook, an article that addresses my very situation. The article is entitled, Letting Go of your Birth Family.

http://spiritualconnectedness.wordpress.com/2014/09/26/letting-go-of-your-birth-family/

Here is a short excerpt that may very well appeal to your spiritual palate. Thanks go to Dennis at Silent Wind of Change for posting it.

gratitude

Enjoy!

It takes both the male energy of self-consciousness and discernment and the female energy of love and understanding to release yourself from ego based consciousness. Regarding your parents, discernment means that you distance yourself from the fear ridden and limiting energies they have fed you. Remember the importance of “the energy of the sword” that I mentioned in the beginning. To let go of your birth family in the spiritual sense, you need to be able to distinguish between their energy and your own and you need to be able to “cut the cords” that limit and suffocate you…Releasing the ties to the parental energy means first and foremost to release the energy from your own mind and emotions. It is about looking within and finding out to what extent you implicitly live by your parents’ set of illusions, by their do’s and don’ts which were based on fear and judgment.

…Once you are clear about this and you allow yourself to let that go, you will be free to forgive them and really “leave the parental house.” It is only after you sever the cords on the inner level and take responsibility for your own life that you can really let your parents be. You will have clearly said “no” to their fears and illusions (sword of discernment), but at the same time you will see that your parents are not identical with their fears and illusions. They also are children of God simply trying to fulfill their soul mission. Once you feel this, you can feel their innocence and you can forgive.
—-
Lightworkers and their parents

…When they start their incarnation, lightworkers have the confidence deep down that they will find their way out that they will overcome the limiting energy of their birth family. However when they are actually born on earth and grow up, they are exposed to the same dilemmas and confusions as any other child. In a certain sense they experience this confusion more deeply and more intensely. Because they are spiritually aware souls who are often older and wiser than their parents, they are very much aware that “something is not right” about the energy of their environment. On the inner level they clash head-on with the parents’ energies, not understanding or resonating with their mind set or behavior. This clash causes great distress inside them, gentle and sensitive as they are. They have to find a way to survive emotionally, coping with the fact that they both love the parents dearly and are very different from them. This causes a lot of psychological problems in lightworkers ranging from loneliness, insecurity and fear to addiction, depression and self-destruction.

…The solitary struggle you all have to go through to discover your light is the heaviest burden for you. On the soul level you have chosen this path consciously, but to live through it as a child of flesh and blood is a painful thing that wounds you deeply. I urge you to feel and recognize this pain in yourself because, only by connecting to it, can you transform and release it. Once you know that wounded child inside that took the cross of alienation upon its fragile shoulders, you will get to the core of your burden. When you get to the core, the solution is nearby. You only need to embrace the pain of that child with a pure and deep awareness. From this awareness the energy of compassion and deep respect will reach out to the child. You will lift the cross just by being with yourself and truly loving and cherishing that part of you that is “different.” This is how you bring the child home and fulfill your mission as the pioneer that you are.

Posted in My Personal Path, Quotes on consciousness | 4 Comments

Book of Hours, II, 16 — Rainer Maria Rilke

Posted on September 25, 2014 by new desert

Book of Hours, II, 16 — Rainer Maria Rilke

II, 16

How surely gravity’s law,
strong as an ocean current,
takes hold of even the strongest thing
and pulls it toward the heart of the world.

Each thing –
each stone, blossom, child –
is held in place.
Only we, in our arrogance,
push out beyond what we belong to
for some empty freedom.

If we surrendered
to earth’s intelligence
we could rise up rooted, like trees.

Instead we entangle ourselves
in knots of our own making
and struggle, lonely and confused.

So, like children, we begin again
to learn from the things,
because they are in God’s heart;
they have never left him.

This is what the things can teach us:
to fall,
patiently to trust our heaviness.
Even a bird has to do that
before he can fly.

~ Rainer Maria Rilke ~

(Rilke’s Book of Hours: Love Poems to God,
translated by Anita Barrows and Joanna Macy)

Posted in Authors, Quotes on consciousness | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Back into my Calling!

Posted on August 14, 2014 by new desert

Back into my Calling!

Today is a beautiful day. It is mostly sunny, I mean when the sun doesn’t play hide and seek with the clouds, and cool. It feels pleasant, like a breezy summer day.
It is good to be over the b’day hump. Not that it was a special or meaningful milestone—I turned 53—, but two days into this New Year of sorts feels like a new beginning. And it feels good! Over the past few months, since we returned from Asia, I have been experiencing a syndrome that I call the “slowness of life.” It is not that nothing happened but it felt slow and uneventful; on the surface only, of course. I understand these are preparatory—and therefore necessary–travails for what will come next but it is not enjoyable all the time. I also understand we are in the midst of the Lion’s Gate energies; powerful energies which will last till the 25th of August, but still I would have desired a little more ‘spiciness to life’ and certainly a little more clarity about my future steps. I believe I am not at a point—yet—where I can enjoy a full spiritual vista, whatever that vista will be.

An interesting thing occurred on my way back from Columbus, Ohio, on June 3rd. I lost interest in my Cathar calling. Please refer to Spiritual Progress and my Cathar Calling for a bit of history. That day, I was reading a book by Cynthia Bourgeault, an Episcopal priest I enjoyed reading from, about Mary Magdalene, and the first part of the book—the religious one—really killed my interest. I stopped after 30 or so pages. Perhaps it wasn’t the right time to read Cynthia’s book, or it is a message that I must search for a different avenue to get where I am supposed to travel.

And so I was, feeling callingless, for a few weeks till my inner flame got rekindled thanks to a discussion with one of my spiritual guides, Master Djwhal Khul. We had a good chat toward the end of July and I asked him several questions about the person my soul used to inhabit in a Cathar existence, Raymond de Périelle, or possibly Raymond de Pereille. I found out last night that his name is also written Ramon de Perella in Catalan and Raimon de Perelha in Occitan. So many variations for one person who apparently signed his name as Perilla in Latin. To make things even more interesting, the father and the son bore the exact same name. It is however easier to identify the life of the son since his story seems to end with the massacre and burning of 200 some Perfects down the walls of Montségur castle on March 16, 1244. Interestingly, I cannot find any information of Raymond de Perella being burned on the pyre, yet it is apparently common knowledge in the area that his mother in law, his wife Corba and his teenage daughter Esclarmonde perished in the flames set by the Inquisitors.

I have certainly much to discover about this intriguing and powerful man who rebuilt (or fortified) the chateau of Montségur in 1204 and turned it into the domicilium et caput (house and head) of the Cathar Church upon the request of the bishop of the time, Guilhabert de Castres, thus attracting Cathar refugees and faidits (I had to search the meaning of that word!) from all around the region.

There is most definitely a connection between the Cathars and the so-called mystery of the Grail, and this is another avenue I will investigate, when the time is ripe. I got tremendously intrigued by this passage from Sean Martin in The Cathars (pages 164-66):

Perhaps the most enduring myth about the Cathars is that they possessed the Holy Grail. The first published version of the Grail myth—Le Conte du Graal—was written around 1180 by Chrétien de Troyes. It recounts the attempts of King Arthur’s knights to find the Grail. Troyes died before he finished the story, so in this version the Grail is never found. The tale was picked up by Wolfram von Eschenbach, whose name remains closely associated with the Grail story. Von Eschenbach’s greatest work is Parzival, which is often understood to be a complex allegory of the path of spiritual development, and which betrays the influence of Eastern philosophy (von Eschenbach is thought to have traveled to the East on a crusade).

He continued to write about the Grail in Titurel and identified the Grail castle as being in the Pyrenees. Moreover, he described the lord of the Grail castle as being called “Perilla.” The fact that Montségur is in the Pyrenees, and that its lord, Raymond Péreille, often signed his name in Latin, Perilla, has led to much speculation. Von Eschenbach’s account has made it harder for historians to dismiss a connection between the Grail and the Cathars. It at least suggests that the Grail myth has been a part of the Cathars story since the time of the Good Christians, and is not just the invention of later writers.

My discussion with Master Djwhal led me to another place in the Pyrénées, about 280 kilometers (175 miles) west of Montségur, called Sarrance. Master told me about the story of a bull who was seen by a little boy kneeling down in front of a statue of the Virgin Marie. At some point, the Virgin disappeared from the village and then later reappeared in the same area. I haven’t done much research yet but Sarrance is a tiny village in the high Pyrénées on the way to Spain. In fact, it is part of the pilgrimage route to Santiago de Compostela; a route which is called the Lana Route, and Sarrance is situated between Lourdes and Jaca, close to the Somport pass. I may have to walk this route one day and spend a few days in the peaceful monastery in Sarrance.

sarrance monastere© Photo Martin M. Miles

There is one more thing that I would like to mention about this period of so-called “slowness.” About two months ago, I acquired a mystical tool called Metatron’s Cube. It is a cube that, set on a polycarbonate tube, spins or rotates on a LED base, illumined that it is by small lights of blue, green, orange and red. If you’d like, take a look at a Meditation on the Energy Flows of Metatron’s Cube .

Here is what Master Djwhal shared with us in his June 2014 teachings (which prompted me to acquire the Cube).

For those of you new to the term, Metatron’s Cube is a geometric symbol. And interestingly enough, it is also a mystical symbol. When cognitively and metaphysically understood, it is the key to Sacred Geometry; thus, and let me underscore this point, it is the key to comprehending the manifest Universe.

While these so-called Platonic solids can certainly be understood mathematically, entering into a direct mystical relationship with them can provide even more. In fact, such is precisely how one may apprehend the creative mysteries imbued within each solid.

Those of you who have actually studied Sacred Geometry likely recognize that it is, or certainly can be, a powerful spiritual path. Indeed by apprehending the Truth encoded within these geometric forms, the mysteries of the Universe can be opened. Such deep knowing is not only invaluable, it is particularly useful when it comes to comprehending how the material level comes into experiential reality. Indeed, it explains how matter actually takes, and subsequently holds, form. Fascinating, isn’t it?

If we peer a bit deeper into the mystery, we will note that an even profounder level of direct knowing is available. Indeed the deeper mystery is actually about how matter partners spirit in the process of vivification. Clearly each one needs the other for evolving human consciousness to manifest in material form. You see, Sacred Geometry, at least for those who can progress beyond its most obvious levels, grants access to a cellular experience of the Divine indwelling within.

I don’t know where this object or tool will take me once I become familiar with it, but it sounds like yet another exciting avenue to pursue. Master Djwhal invited me to put the cube under our bed at night, although it is not lit and doesn’t spin on the LED base that came with it. By ‘sleeping on the Cube,’ I seem to have fuller access to my dreams. They become vivid, affecting a part of my brain where I can read them, which has rarely been the case until now.

Last night’s dream was interesting. I was with an older Frenchman (an experienced accountant called Jean Corre) with whom I worked in Brazzaville, Congo, in 1986. We then together taught a seminar to the Congolese auditors we were training. At some point my dream shifted to another area and I could see people registering for another seminar. Or what is the same seminar? A skilled carpenter was building small houses, which looked like miniature toy houses. They were so magnificently manufactured that I thought it would be a good idea to offer each participant a ‘small house’ as a token of our appreciation. And finally I could see myself at the top of a mountainous place, perhaps in a room, when it started to snow. It was really bad weather, and unusual weather as well (from what I understood, it never snowed at that time of the year). It seems that I then regained a brief glimpse of consciousness before our son woke me up. “Time to wake up, Papa,” he said, as he handed me my clothes. The message was, as we say in French, on ne peut plus clair (it couldn’t be any clearer), and I got up.

Till we meet again, folks and walkers of the path.

In appreciation for our continued companionship.

sarrance vierge noire

Sarrance (Basses-Pyrenees)
Notre Dame de Sarrance; de la Pierre or La Sarrasine, difficult to date, black stone, found by bull swimming in river 8 C, hidden from Protestants 1569 in mountain cave, saved at Rev., damaged arms and head have been replaced.

http://campus.udayton.edu/mary/resources/blackm/blackm02.html

Posted in Authors, My Personal Path | Tagged , , , , , , | 4 Comments

I believe in all – Je crois by Rainer Maria Rilke

Posted on July 28, 2014 by new desert

I believe in all — Rainer Maria Rilke

I believe in all that has never yet been spoken.
I want to free what waits within me
so that what no one has dared to wish for
may for once spring clear
without my contriving.

If this is arrogant, God, forgive me,
but this is what I need to say.
May what I do flow from me like a river,
no forcing and no holding back,
the way it is with children.

Then in these swelling and ebbing currents,
these deepening tides moving out, returning,
I will sing to you as no one ever has,
streaming through widening channels
into the open sea.

~ Rainer Maria Rilke ~

(Rilke’s Book of Hours: Love Poems to God, translated by Anita Barrows and Joanna Macy)

 

Je crois

Je crois en tout ce qui n’a pas encore été énoncé.
Je veux libérer en moi ce qui attend, patiemment,
afin que ce que personne n’a encore osé imaginer
soit un jour libre de s’affranchir en dépit de mon entremise.

Si ce souhait te semble orgueilleux, pardonne-moi, mon Dieu,
mais c’est ce que j’ai besoin d’exprimer.
Que ce que j’entreprenne coule de moi comme une rivière limpide,
sans effort et sans retenue,
comme le font si généreusement
les enfants innocents.

Du sein de ces courants qui s’en vont et qui reviennent,
de ces marées qui avancent, puis soudain reculent,
je louerai ton nom comme personne ne l’a jamais osé,
ouvrant ainsi un champ synonyme de plénitude.

Traduction et « entremise » : Gilles Asselin

Posted in Authors, My Personal Path | Tagged | Leave a comment

What is it you plan to do…with your one wild and precious life?

Posted on June 24, 2014 by new desert

The Summer Day

Who made the world?
Who made the swan, and the black bear?
Who made the grasshopper?
This grasshopper, I mean–
the one who has flung herself out of the grass,
the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,
who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down,
who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.
Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.
Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.

I don’t know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down
into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,
how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,
which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn’t everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?

~ Mary Oliver ~

New and Selected Poems, Volume I

Posted in Authors, Quotes on consciousness | Tagged , | 1 Comment

Love after Love

Posted on June 19, 2014 by new desert

Love after Love

The time will come when,
with elation,
you will greet yourself arriving at your own door,
in your own mirror,
and each will smile at the other’s welcome,
and say, sit here.
Eat.

You will love again the stranger who was your self.
Give wine.
Give bread.
Give back your heart to itself,
to the stranger who has loved you all your life,
whom you ignored for another,
who knows you by heart.

Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,
the photographs,
the desperate notes,
peel your own image from the mirror.
Sit.
Feast on your life.

~ Derek Walcott ~
Sea Grapes

Posted in Authors, My Personal Path | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Spiritual Progress and a Cathar Calling

Posted on May 7, 2014 by new desert

Spiritual Progress and a Cathar Calling
May 6, 2014

I haven’t written for a while as I was waiting for the inspiration to pop up. Today, May 6, 2014, seems like a good day to share some of my progress; some of it comes from walking my own path and reflecting; some of it from contacting people who have information about my soul path.

This post is in fact partly an update of the account I produced last August under the title My Hero’s Journey.

There has been interesting information communicated to me last month as I did work on the Divine Feminine as part of a virtual class with a small spiritual organization. As I understood back then, when I started learning about the Divine Feminine, I was about to return to the conscious phase of my hero’s journey and enjoy what Joseph Campbell calls the “Gift of the Goddess.” Throughout the class, I was part of a pod, or discussion group, under the tutelage of the Celtic goddess Ceridwen. Things were interesting for a couple of weeks, we shared a lot of insights about astrology and the divine feminine, which dwells in every one of us, and then my interest started to dwindle; drastically. I had started to transcribe The Mother, from Sri Aurobindo, which was part of our reading assignment, but didn’t go any further than chapter one of this small book. It felt very organic, or synchronistic if you will that, at the same time I was taking the class, I had an exchange with my friend Gary, the astrologist whom I mentioned in my Hero’s Journey post. His take on my studying the divine feminine was to the point, well aligned with what I am pursuing. Here is an excerpt of what he shared with me.

Your work on the Divine Feminine sounds very interesting. It accords very well with the placement of Mars in Virgo in your chart in its own house of the 8th; this being in trine aspect to the Ascendant, Saturn and Jupiter. To me, this implies the requirement of developing an enhanced appreciation of the ‘goddess archetype’ and the various gifts she offers. As well as the Hercules and Hippolyta myth, it also accords well with the myth of Isis and Horus, or Mary and Jesus, whereby one gives birth to the spiritual principle within. In your case this is occurring through the expression of courage and heroism towards spiritual transformation due to the location of Mars, and also the Moon, in conjunction to Pluto in the 8th house. Working with the goddess principles is favored further by the placement of Venus in Cancer in the 6th house, in trine aspect to Neptune in Scorpio in the 9th house, which suggests a capacity towards penetrating Maya (or the ‘veil of the goddess’) with the assistance of subjective pursuits such as dreams and meditation.

I don’t know if I penetrated any veil at the time but, based on Joseph Campbell diagram (which I am repositioning below), the spiritual warrior is then supposed to reenter the conscious world and share his or her gift with it. What could this gift be in my case? And what did I learn from the goddess in the end?

The hero's journey

These questions are somehow still open and yet, something quite unusual happened to me, which was definitely a spiritual gift. I was offered in mid-April a soul reading by a person (her name is Judith Kusel http://www.judith-kusel.com) who lives in South Africa. As synchronicity and spiritual complicity would have it, I met her through one of her writings one day, totally unexpectedly, and signed up to follow her blog. The next day, I received a note inviting me to check her biography and services. And the next thing I knew, I had signed up for a soul reading—a Diamond soul reading. There was so much fluidity in what I did and how I did it that it was obviously made to happen.

The most important life episode that Judith highlightened is one that I experienced as a Cathar in early 13th century France. My name then was Raimond de Péreille and I was present during the last few days of what could be considered the extermination of the last of the Cathars. This took place on March 16, 1244, in the form of a pyre which was built and lit on by the armies of the French king, supported by the Pope, interestingly named Innocent III. Over 200 hundred Cathars perished that day, purified that they were a few days earlier in a ceremony called Consolamentum. It appears that I wasn’t one of those who perished in the fire and that I clandestinely escaped, in due time, to accomplish what was then my mission.

cathar Montsegur

I still have a lot to learn about those Christian Cathars and reading The Cathar Prophecy by Mark J.T. Griffin provided a lot of background information, although the author doesn’t seem to know what exactly happened to Sir Raimond de Péreille. It is up to me to find out and put all the pieces of the puzzle together, going back way, way before Cathar time.

In fact, what became clear to me is the connection between the Cathar faith and the history and life of Mary Magdalene after she left Israel, moving to France and landing near Massilia (Marseille nowadays), pregnant that she was then with their (Yeshua and she) third child. Montségur, the castle that became the last resort of the Cathars, is situated near Carcassonne in southern France; Rennes-le-Chateau, a small village whose name is strongly associated with Mary Magdalene and the hero of Mark J.T. Griffin’s book—a Templar of the Order of St. John of Malta, by the name of Arnaud de Blanchfort—being some 30 miles or so east of Montségur. I could feel or intuit the connection between these different times and people while reading the book. It is now up to me to find about the missing links, which will take me in the first place into the reading of another book, Holy Blood, Holy Grail, by Michael Baigent, Richard Leigh and Henry Lincoln. Or will it be, Crusade against the Grail by Otto Rahn?

I did not sense the protective presence of Mary Magdalene over the Cathars by chance or accident and I feel a true connection to her. While exploring what my coach called my “inner sanctuaries” in October of 2011, I came across Mary Magdalene in the second sanctuary, that of Ancestral Memory.

Here is what I wrote in my notes after my session with Lev on October 4, 2011:

Sanctuary of Ancestral Memory
Mary Magdalene comes to mind as she moves from Israel to the south of France. She is wearing a white robe. The symbol in this sanctuary is a dove; a white dove.

mary-magdalene-by-perugio

I learned since that Mary Magdalene is indeed associated with a white dove; I also remember seeing white linen floating in the wind, as if on a cloth line, in that sanctuary of Ancestral Memory. Again this is not something that came from outside my psyche while reading a fictitious book, but rather from some deep connection I had been nurturing all along and that made ‘its way up’ with the assistance of Lev.

Where is this going to take me? I certainly do not know at this early time, but my spelunker’s gear is on! Please stay tune, my friends, and feel free to share any information that you would deem helpful to me.

Posted in My Personal Path | Tagged , , , , , | 13 Comments

The Seven Essene Mirrors – a workshop by Gregg Braden

Posted on April 5, 2014 by new desert

Bonjour Folks,

I am back again with a piece that I watched this week—I watched it twice in its entirety over the course of two days. It is long (two hours and five minutes) but worth every minute of our time. In this video, which combines Gregg’s explanation of the Seven Mirrors as well as a live workshop with participants (thanks go to them as well for being willing to get filmed), Gregg Braden details the Seven Mirrors that the Essenes use to explain relationships and how we function in this world.

The two most powerful mirrors to me are the second one (Mirror of that which is judged) and the fifth one (Mirror of “Father”/”Mother). I won’t spend much time commenting about the second one, which confirmed much about what I sensed, but would like to give a bit more info about the fifth one, which still puzzles me.

The Mirror of “Father”/”Mother” refers to our relationship with the Feminine and Masculine side of the Creatrix/Creator—whatever our spiritual beliefs are. Gregg said that our parents show us the fifth mirror during the course of our passage with them and that it represents our relationship with the Sacred and will tell us why we lived our lives the way we did. In other words, the way we see (and judge) our parents is a mirror about the expectations, perceptions or beliefs we have about our most sacred relationship with the Heavenly Father and Heavenly Mother.

In the workshop, before explaining the meaning of the Mirror, Gregg asked participants to list one positive characteristic about each of their parents and one negative. This represents, again, how we see the Creatrix/Creator.

As for my parents, the words that came to mind are “emotionally withdrawn” and “simple and gentle” for my father, who passed; and “self-centered” and “loving in her own way” for my mother, who is still alive. For whatever reason, a veil of some sort is preventing me at this very moment to put two and two together and see how “emotionally withdrawn” influenced(es) my perception of the Creator, and how “self-centered” colors of my perception of the Divine Mother—especially now that I am attending a virtual eight-week class entitled “Embodying the Divine Feminine.”

I know there will be a time when this veil will be lifted, and this may be soon…who knows?

You will find below the summary slide that Gregg offered, which lists the Seven Mirrors along with a last segment on Compassion. You will also find the time when the different mirrors are addressed, in case you would like to go back to the video and watch pieces of it.

Happy veil lifting, folks!

Every experience is a blessing

Gregg Braden

The Seven Essene Mirrors

Published on May 6, 2012

From the perspective of the ancient Essenes, every human on the earth is an initiate in the Mystery School that we call Life. Whether they are conscious of it or not, every human will experience in the presence of others mirrors of themselves in that moment. If we have the wisdom to recognize those mirrors, we may accelerate the evolution of emotion and understanding.

What the Essenes said was that, in order for us to know and master ourselves in this world, we will see one or some combination of mirrored patterns in others. The seven mirrors are progressively more and more subtle. Back in the ’70s, we heard about the first mirror of who you are in the moment. The notion was that if you find yourself around individuals who are angry or dishonest, they are showing you your dishonesty or anger. Sometimes the mirrors would apply, but sometimes they wouldn’t. We had discovered the first mirror but had yet to see the other mirrors, such as the second mirror, which reflects what we judge in the moment.

This is tremendously powerful and very subtle. The ancient Essenes had a very sophisticated understanding of interpersonal human relationships and the role of emotion in those relationships. It’s the role of emotion that we have carefully sifted out of our Western experience up until very recently. Now, as we go back into these texts, we see that it is emotion that proves the power and, when coupled with logic, true magic and miracles occur.

The Seven Essene Mysteries of Self

You’ll find the summary slide (what I listed below) at 13’49 and 38’26

• Mystery of the First Mirror: Mirror of the Moment (1’15)
• Mystery of the Second Mirror: Mirror of that which is judged (2’05)
• Mystery of the Third Mirror: Mirror of that which is (20’55)
o Lost
o Given away
o Taken away
• Mystery of the Fourth Mirror: Mirror of “Most Forgotten Love” (23’05)
• Mystery of the Fifth Mirror: Mirror of “Father/Mother” (48’10)
• Mystery of the Sixth Mirror: Mirror of Your Quest into Darkness (1’14’47)
• Mystery of Seventh Mirror: Mirror of Self Perception (1’38’40)
• Conclusion (1’51’05)
• Compassion (1:52’27)
• Compassion may be defined as:
o Thought without attachment to the outcome
o Feeling without distortion
o Emotion without charge

Posted in Authors, My Personal Path, Quotes on consciousness | Tagged , , , , | 7 Comments